"Relationship Fitness" and Midlife

My services are targeted primarily to people who are in midlife. That is such a dynamic time of life, isn't it? The midlife passage begins for most at around the age of 38. This is a time when we begin to ask new questions. It's a time when we begin to realize that what carried us so successfully through the first half of life just isn't going to carry us through the challenges of the second half. For many, the midlife years are an invitation from Greatness to step more fully into the quest to discover their own truth - and to live it fully.

What are the midlife years inviting you into?

When I was building my website, I spent a considerable time thinking about what to call it. I chose "Relationship Fitness Online" because my work as a Transformational Life and Wellness Coach is really about helping individuals in midlife to transform how they are relating in the various relationships of their life.

Consider. You have a relationship with many things in life.

A relationship with your body.
A relationship with your thoughts, feelings, and moods.
A relationship with other people.
A relationship with events that occur.
A relationship with your past and future.
A relationship with a culture.
A relationship with God.
And so on...

Relationship Fitness is all about making these various relationships in your life optimally healthy. And this involves becoming masterful at relating. The quality of your relationships is - right now - determining the quality of your life and your future.

So, how do we improve the quality of our relationships? To dramatically improve the relationships in your life requires that you become masterful at being an Observer. Once you can observe something, you are in a relationship with it.

For example, let's say that a person is experiencing a great deal of problems in their life because they are not aware of what is going on for them emotionally. As a coach, I would work with this person in designing some self-observation exercises where they would begin to observe what they are feeling as they move through the day. Once they can observe a feeling, they can decide how they will relate to it. As they become more mindful of their own emotions, they can choose to create a healthy relationship (improve their "Relationship Fitness") with those emotions. Now, instead of being ruled by their emotions, they can choose how they will relate to them and manage them. This will in turn open up many new possibilities for the client.

The interesting thing about midlife is that the state of health of our relationships really begins to reveal itself. It's as if Life is saying, "It's time to get serious about who you are - and how you are relating."

If you're in midlife and facing challenges in your relationships, feel free to give me a call at 812-299-0214. I'd enjoy the opportunity to explore working with you in creating relationships that are optimally healthy and making the second half of your life truly amazing!

-Denver

President Obama and Your Future

The election of our new President, Mr. Obama has been an inspiring event for me. It's reached in and touched something deep and profound in people. I've seen it in their eyes. That sparkle. That look of hope and inspiration. That belief that there can be something better emerge from within us, within our country, and within the world.

For me, the most exciting aspect is the invitation of our new President for people to truly step forward and to get involved. He's inviting us to take an active role, to truly step into the moment with our gifts and talents and lend a helping hand to ourselves, others, the country, and the world. It's an invitation that seems - to me - to somehow reach beyond our borders. I can't help but think that it is an invitation heard around the world.

In order to accept this invitation, each of us will need to learn to rise above the limitations of the circumstances in which we find ourselves. As a coach, this is one of my greatest opportunities in working with others: to help them live their lives powerfully - to BE their greatness - despite the circumstances.

If you live your life defined solely by the circumstances in which you find yourself, how will you ever live beyond them?

And what would be possible, if you learned how to live powerfully, despite the circumstances you find yourself in?

For many, circumstances are seen as the source of their happiness and power. Many think: "As soon as my circumstances change for the better, then I will be happy - then I will show up and offer the best of who I am." As soon as I make enough money... As soon as I feel better... As soon as my spouse changes... As soon as I get that new job... As soon as I lose 25 pounds... If you wait for circumstances to change, you may wait most of your life away. If you wait, you will suffer.

Everyday, life offers us what it offers us. And everyday, Life is asking us: "Despite what is here in front of you now, who do you choose to be?" Despite the circumstances in which you find yourself - job lay off, divorce, financial problems, health issues, etc. - who do you choose to be?

It will take a deep courage and a willingness to self-author who we are if we are truly going to be a gift to the world... if we are truly going to offer our greatness to the world... if we are truly going to create and live new possibilities for ourselves and others. This is true not only for us individually, but for us as a country and for all of us as citizens of the world.

If you are ready to learn what it takes to accept the President's invitation to be a contribution, and if you are ready to live your greatness despite your current circumstances, then give me a call (812-299-0214) or e-mail me at denver@relationshipfitnessonline.com. I'd love to hear from you and would enjoy exploring how we could work together to turn your intentions into a living reality!

You are a gift to the world. BE that gift TODAY!

-Denver

Stepping Into Your Greatness in 2009

Do you believe in your own greatness?

Agreed, "greatness" is not often the subject of our conversations around the kitchen table or in the workplace. The idea of being GREAT almost sounds too "out there" to be a serious consideration for many people. Perhaps it's seen as only something professional actors, musicians, and athletes pursue.

Nevertheless, there is greatness within you. And I'm wondering as you read this, if you are aware of that - and more importantly - in what ways you are living your own greatness right now.

Perhaps you've noticed that our modern culture is not really geared toward people discovering and living their greatness. You don't have to be your greatness to watch TV, shop, use your iPhone or iPod, go to the movies, or - in many cases - perform your job.

So why bother with being GREAT?

Stepping into your greatness is about being a gift - a contribution - to the world. It's about living beyond the mediocrity that our modern culture often invites us into. It's about believing in yourself and the value that you have to offer others. It's about continuous learning and growth. It's about living fully in each moment, bringing the best of who you are into this moment right now. It's about mastering your craft and offering it to the others for their edification and growth. It's about seeing the people and environment around you with fresh eyes, seeing the miracle that other people are and honoring and celebrating it. It's about allowing Life - God - to express through you fully - to actually become the very hands, eyes, and expression of divinity right now, in this moment.

What does it mean to YOU to be great?

And what would be possible for you this year if you challenged yourself to step into your own greatness, and then to step boldly into your family, workplace, and the world as the gift that you?

In service to the your greatness,
Denver